Let me start off by saying that not all girl power is good power. Often times we hear women pushing us to support each other and stick together, but no one really talks about the negative effect toxic women can have on our lives.
Toxic friendships are just as detrimental as toxic relationships.
I once had a friend that I knew I needed to cut off. She was really ratchet, she had a horrible attitude whenever I brought her around new people, and she was extremely insecure. I know you’re probably thinking, “well why didn’t you try to help her out?” I did.
I tried everything under the sun to help this girl, but then I realized that she didn’t want to change. See, you can’t help people who don’t want to be helped. No matter how many times I tried to motivate her, help her pick out clothes, or talk to her about her attitude, she just did not want to change.
It took too much work to be her friend, and at this stage in your life friendships should be hassle-free. I’m not saying you won’t have disagreements, but they should be very few. I found myself taking too much time out of my day to boost her confidence and hold her hand through life.
Don’t get me wrong you should be there for your friends, uplift them, encourage them, and always be a listening ear. But, I was being more of a parent and that just ain’t gone fly over here.
When I decided to distance myself from that friendship, I felt a literal weight being lifted off my shoulders. And guess what? It made it easier to walk away from other toxic relationships. I began dropping those friendships like a bad habit. And you know what happened after that?
God replaced those negative friendships with positive ones. He sent me a group of women who are more than friends to me–they’re my sisters. We encourage each other, pray for one another, laugh, joke, and cry together. These girls have been there with me through some of my toughest times and also my greatest accomplishments.
My current friendships are proof that there are great women out there, and you can have a big group of diverse friends. If my Instagram post brought you here then you know that I just went to NOLA with a mixed group of friends that met for the first time the day before we went on the trip. Our weekend was full of laughs, love, and countless memories. Not one single argument, not one disagreement, and definitely no bad vibes.
Your girl tribe is out there, you just have to find them. Let go of that friendship that’s weighing you down or holding you back. Once you lose the deadweight then you’ll really be able to flourish. It may seem hard at first, but girl it ain’t nothing to cut that b**** off!
Peace, love, and good vibes…